


Halfa Ways To Die

by GothMoth



Series: May's Phantastical Callings [8]
Category: Danny Phantom
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe - Crack, Blood, Comedy, Crack, Gen, Mild Gore, Song Parody, deathday, gun - Freeform, halfa's have to kill themselves to go ghost
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-09
Updated: 2019-07-09
Packaged: 2020-05-28 14:41:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 521
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19396246
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GothMoth/pseuds/GothMoth
Summary: Dumb ways to die parody because I was up at 2 am





	Halfa Ways To Die

**Author's Note:**

> Warning: Gun violence, going dead but more literal, blood

Vlad has no clue why the hell his little badger is snickering and grinning like a complete fool, or why his two regular friends have cameras. But he knows Daniel must be looking for a fight, as he watches him kick over a stop sign and impale his face with it, promptly going ghost. 

Vlad doesn’t get a chance to even consider following suit as he’s too stunned as Phantom starts singing?

🎵 Strangle myself with someone’s hair

Run towards and get mauled, by a bear

Tell a hunter I’m a ghost on our date

Use my face as live fish bait 🎵 

Sam and Tucker sing the hook, trying hard not to laugh.

🎵 Halfa ways to die 

So many halfa ways to die 🎵 

Danny continues singing as he throws black and white confetti in the air. 

🎵 Swallow one too many sporks

Rip my heart out to make sure it still works

Willingly forget to fly

Drown myself in rhubarb pie 🎵 

Sam and Tucker are honestly amazed no one is coming outside to check what’s going on, so throwing caution to the wind. They belt out their tune hella loud.

🎵 Halfa ways to die 

So many halfa ways to die 🎵 

Being the little shit he is, Danny tries to out loud his friends.

🎵 Turn on literally anything while I’m inside

Toss myself in front of an amusement park ride

Fling myself into the void of space 

Shoot a rocket at my face 🎵 

Sam and Tucker shoot streamer guns at Danny, draping green streamers over him. Singing all the while. 

🎵 Halfa ways to die 

So many halfa ways to die 🎵 

Danny flips off Vlad, sounding almost concerningly aggressive, as he sings.

🎵 Cuddle a rabid squirrel like a pet

Blow myself up to ensure Tucker loses a bet

Smashing my face with highly combustible hot sauce could be fun too

What does this poorly placed Fenton button do 🎵 

Vlad is far too confused to even wonder why Sam and Tucker finger-gun shoot themselves while singing.

🎵 Halfa ways to die

So many Halfa ways to die 🎵 

Vlad also doesn't want to know where Daniel got balloons or why they look to be coated in blood. Which splatters around as he sings.

🎵 Out myself to the Guys In White 

Shrug and refuse to fight 

Full force smash into a brick wall

Walk backwards off a building and fall 🎵 

Sam and Tucker drag out some big crate, which is clearly heavy enough to make them struggle to sing.

🎵 Halfa ways to die

So many Halfa ways to die 🎵 

Halfway through Danny’s singing a massive banner reading “it’s my death day Cheesehead! So suffer!”, pops out of the crate.

🎵 Tell Dash it’s Danny hunting season

Stab myself repeatedly for no real reason

Walking inside a massive portal on a dare 

Putting your face in front of a mini-portal like the frootloop you are 

They may not rhyme but they’re quite possibly the most Halfa ways to die 🎵 

As Vlad mutters, “Daniel what?”. Phantom slides up doing erratic jazz hands, grinning wildly and wide-mouthed. Before whipping out a pistol and point-blank shooting Vlad in the face, “it’s Danny bitch”. 

**End.**


End file.
